Tequila and Slurpees
by Kame-sama
Summary: The now Sunnydale departed former Dingoes Ate My Baby bandmates Oz and Devon are in San Francisco. They're on a quest for tequila and slurpees when unexpected guests appear out of nowhere. Rated R for language.


Title: Tequila and Slurpees  
  
Author: Kamé  
  
Rating: R (bad language)  
  
Notes: Oz and Devon are getting drunk and having slurpees. What a story. Sort of a Doctor Who crossover. A response to Vashti's challenge. BTW, that famous wise man saying came from my grandpa!  
  
Feedback: Please, pretty please! (Noelle-chan@wfm.zzn.com)  
  
"Oh, fuck, we're out of slurpees", Devon mumbled half drunk.  
  
"Make a run to 7-11?", Oz asked.  
  
"Yeah, but you're driving bitch", Devon said he wiped a bit of drool off of his mouth that had come out when he was passed for a bit.  
  
Oz shrugged. This was a normal saturday night with Devon here in their apartment in San Francisco. Devon didn't like the taste of Margaritas but he liked tequila. His other big favorite beverage were slurpees. He got a big idea one day to combine his two favorites and this has been the saturday night drink of choice ever since. As a wise man once said, "It's not tequila, it's to-kill-ya". Being drunk off their asses come late night and hangover city sunday morning.  
  
Oz managed to get Devon into a jacket as he stumbled to the doorway nearly tripping over some empty pizza boxes. Oz was significantly less intoxicated than Devon and went around the boxes but managed to step in a wad of blue bubble gum. He looked at it annoyingly but left it alone to mess with it later. They went to the beat up Dingomobile (really Oz's old van horribly fucked up by other band members recklessly driving it).  
  
Devon actually managed to open the door without any assistance and plopped himself down on the seat.  
  
"Let's roll man!", Devon shouted.  
  
The 7-11 wasn't really that far. Only about a mile from their pad. Exactly 7 stoplights and 2 stopsigns.  
  
The last stop sign gave them problems. Or rather the blue bubble gum.  
  
"Shit Oz! Stop!", Devon managed to say.  
  
Oz had not only ran the stop sign but also could not get his foot off the accelerator. Oz had once told Devon that his blue Bubble Yum gum was going to kill by causing a stomach blockage or something. Now, the gum was threatening to kill them in another way. Oz had been struggling to get his foot off the accelerator wildly trashing his lower body causing not only the van to go faster but also into the parking lot of the 7-11 and towards the big red and green sign. All that movement finally paid off and Oz got his foot free just in time preventing the van from hitting the sign by stepping on the breaks.  
  
Devon just looked at him while getting off and Oz put the van into park where it lay.  
  
Devon waited for Oz at the entrance of the 7-11 because Oz was the one with the money. "After you milady", Devon motioned to the door.  
  
The Sikh employee eyed the two that nearly ran into the sign.  
  
Oz and Devon strolled down the aisles. Devon grabbed several bags of chips and Oz responded by shaking his head in a no response. "We only have enough money for liquor. What do you want, food or liquor", Oz asked impatiently.  
  
"Well if you put it that way, tequila and slurpees it is", Devon responded.  
  
"Now, put down the chips. I'll the slurpees and you get the tequila", Oz ordered.  
  
Devon found his way to the liquor part to the refrigerated section. He peered into the glass doors looking for his bottle. He found his favorite, Jose Cuervo.  
  
"Joe Crow my friend, we have much to catch up on", he said while taking the bottle out of the fridge.  
  
By the time Devon arrived at the cash register counter Oz had already paid for everything and didn't bother to get a bag for the tequila. After going out of the store, they sat on the curb. Oz gave Devon his slurpee and Devon generously poured some tequila into Oz's plastic slurpee cup.  
  
"Here's to the atom bomb, may everyone find a way to get on", said Devon as he toasted Oz.  
  
Sitting back they drank heartily till something strange occurred. A blue English police box materializing on top of their Dingomobile.  
  
"Haven't I seen this movie before?", Devon asked befuddled.  
  
The door of the blue police box swung open and out ran a small man in a Nehru jacket. He had a mechanical device in his hand and was twirling it wildly over his head. "Come back here you thief! I'll get you Mini-Me!", a voice from inside the box shouted.  
  
The man identified as Mini-Me jumped into the Dingomobile and started it. Peeling off in the van, he sent the blue police box tumbling to the ground on its side.  
  
"Fuck Oz! You left the keys in the ignition!", Devon shouted.  
  
Oz was at a loss for words.  
  
The man who was shouting at Mini-Me now climbed out of the blue box.  
  
"Mother fucking fucker!!!....err I mean, hello. My name is...", the man started to say.  
  
"Rufus?", Devon said with a smile on his face.  
  
"No! I am known as the Doctor", the man stated.  
  
"Oh", Oz and Devon said at the same time.  
  
"This is my TARDIS, it stands for..", the doctor began to say.  
  
"Totally Awesome Radical Dudes In Space?", Devon said while he had pointed to himself and Oz.  
  
"What the fuck is your problem? Are you stoned or drunk?", the Doctor demanded.  
  
"A little from column A, a little from column B", Devon said while grinning.  
  
"Who cares for what it stands for, what is it exactly", Oz asked.  
  
"It's a space time machine", the Doctor replied.  
  
"Hey! I bet your mission here is to take us back in time, pick up world history figures, help us pass history class and help us win the battle of the bands!", Devon exclaimed.  
  
The Doctor just slapped his forehead and closed his eyes. He made a note to himself not to come back to the United States for a good long while. He just was really pissed. In a motion of goodwill, Oz held out his half drank cup of tequila/slurpee. The doctor's face softened and accepted the cup.  
  
"Ah, what the hell. It gets rather tiring saving your asses day after day, century after century. I'm long due for a break. To hell with Mini-Me and the matter reduction device.", the Doctor declared. He took a big swig and look satisfied when the effect started in. Oz didn't like that last comment about the stolen device but didn't dwell on it too long.  
  
"What's your names?", he asked the guys.  
  
"I'm Devon, rock god of the ages and lead singer of Dingoes Ate My Baby and this is Oz, guitarist/werewolf", Devon said after letting out a belch.  
  
The Doctor shrugged and all proceeded in getting drunk.  
  
THE END 


End file.
